One man I spoke with, now divorced, took Scott Hahn’s Christian marriage class with his theology-major fiancée.Another couple, now divorced, made the twin sacrifices of building a large family and allowing the wife to stay home — because, in the ex-husband’s words, “Simpleminded me, I looked at every sacrament as precious and worthy.” Two others, now divorced, helped at their parish and were sacrificing to send their kids to Catholic schools.“When that one spouse visits a lawyer, they place the entire family in the hands of a hostile court system.Children become wards of the state, and all marital assets are controlled by the courts.Alienation is often hard to clearly define and legally prove and many target parents come to realize that trying to prove parental alienation in court is quite challenging, expensive and time-consuming.Even if these parents are able to do so, many court systems are not equipped to deal with such high-conflict parenting situations that need intensive intervention.
The direct and collateral damages that result from parental alienation lead to long-lasting effects that are enormously destructive and destabilizing to both the children and the parents involved.“Alienation of affection damages the child’s core of her sense of self and her ability to form lasting, intimate relationships with friends and family.
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In addition, since the alienating parent is usually well-experienced at using litigation as a means to control the target parent, many target parents are exhausted and depleted by previous litigation and may fear that more legal intervention will only make things worse.
Mc Ghee recommends that parents seek out professionals who truly understand the underlying dynamics of the problem, try hard not to take the child’s rejection personally and stay committed to positive co-parenting behaviors.When the courts are reluctant to deal with such cases or not able to effectively intervene in a consistently effective manner, these parents often find that the family law attorneys they consult with either minimize the situation or are reluctant to pursue the issues in court.